I feel embarrassed to go on-top
I’ve been with my partner for 9 months now. He’s older than me and has had many more sexual partners than I have. He loves me going on top but I always avoid it as I feel really self-conscious and embarrassed about it as I really don’t know what to do.
Thanks for getting in touch. Firstly I just want to reassure you. We have all been at that place where we’re a bit anxious and unsure of doing something that we haven’t done before. It’s completely normal. Doing sexual things with a person is a big deal and if they are more experienced than you are you may worry if you’re getting it ‘right’. Well in case you didn’t already know – there is no ‘right’. Every person and every experience is different. That’s the beauty of it all. You can make it your own and experiment together to find ways of doing things that you both like.
The only way you can change that fear or feeling of being embarrassed to go on top though is by facing it and actually doing it. Remember that your man wants you to be sexy and confident. He wants you to feel great while you’re up there riding him so try not to feel like he’s judging you and your performance. Try not to think about his last girlfriends and what they did. It’s all about you and him now. Go with it and do what feels right for you. What feels good for your body? Over thinking things in bed can sometimes ruin the sexy connection as your mind is on something else instead of how things feel.
Get the lighting right and maybe put on a sexy outfit that helps you to feel more confident and emphasizes body parts you are proud of. Also ask your man to guide you. Put his hands on your hips and whisper in his ear ‘show me how you like it’ then he can guide you with his hands and help you find a pace you both like.
I am doing a workshop on how to ride your man and rock his world so make sure you’re signed up to the page so you know when that will be going live. I will be teaching and demonstrating a bunch of incredible techniques that any woman can learn and I’ll also be giving lots of tips and tricks on how to make it an experience you both won’t forget! You’ll never have to feel embarrassed again.
Al the best with it Louise.