This is quite an embarrassing situation but I’m so confused and don’t know what else to do. I lost my virginity when I was 17 and have had quite a few sexual partners since then. The problem is they all seem to leave after I sleep with them. I’ve always thought that if a woman doesn’t sleep with a man, then they’d leave so I usually have sex with a new man fairly quickly. My friends have also told me that I have sex too soon. The majority of the guys come up with some excuse like ‘I just don’t want to be with anyone right now’ or ‘I need to focus on work or studies’ but one guy that I was friends with before we had sex told me guys don’t hang around because I’m too easy. Do you think that is true?
I can’t exactly say if that is true or not but I can tell you that men love a challenge. If you sleep with a man too quickly he has nothing to work towards. It will also make him wonder how many other guys you have given your goodies away to so soon. Men tend to think women that sleep around great for a shag but not exactly ‘wifey’ material. They want to feel like they are special and that’s why you have let them inside you which is ultimately a very big deal. It’s always a good idea to listen to the advice of your good friends as they care about you and know you best. Don’t feel like you have to sleep with a man to keep him there Kelly. Sex will keep some men coming back but maybe not for the reasons you want them to. By sleeping with them too soon you are missing out on all the build-up and anticipation when you become really attracted to someone. You are also missing the chance of getting to know a bit more about them before you decide to let them in and get intimate. Any guy that truly likes you will wait until you are ready for sex. It makes you more mysterious and desirable. With the next guy you meet try not to jump into bed too soon. Go on dates, get to know them first and make them work to have you. Try to pick date 4, 8 or even 20 before you have sex. You’ll find that if you both get on it will really build excitement between you and it will help you filter out the men that just want sex from those that may want something more. Good luck!